An old friend and confidant called.
He had heard what happened between her and I.
And I am sharing this because I feel the need to be openly honest to myself.
He said,"Bro you guys were never in love.You cared for one another but you weren't in love.Now here is your chance to maybe meet someone and ahve a chance to feel what you didnt feel with her."
Man........straight out with it why dont ya!!!!that wasnt anything that we didnt say to each other tho the night we decided to split.It just took a while before it sank in.It felt good to hear it from an outsider though.
In five years there must have been some tingles in there and I KNOW that there were,but....it just wasn't there enough.
I am coming to terms with where I fit in her life and I just have to deal with it.I cant fight it.
Personally I know that I might have said things aloud that I might have regretted but i have kept it all here to reflect on.I explained to a coworker how I am very cautious and aware not to put myself too close to anything that I could turn to to hurt me.I guess I was wise to pass on that gun permit...just kidding....but you know what I mean....
I have great friends and a chance at a new beginning.....thats all I need.
Loneliness sucks but whatevs.
Thanks so much for all the support and that only gives me more reason to lift my head up...so I can be here for all my friends when they need me like I need them now.
I will be here.Peace
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1 comment:
Hmmm... I have to agree w/ your friend cuz... you two were never really in love.... I never got that warm and fuzzy feeling from the two of you when you were together or when you looked at eachother. It was more of a convience and it was what was comfortable. You will find love and you will find happiness. For now love yourself and love your life because life is wonderful and life is too short to be unhappy!
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